Mini Meltdown

Had a mini meltdown today. I had my first car accident on Saturday (no big deal and no injuries to myself or the other person). I handled all the paperwork, making the insurance claim, dealt with the auto repair mechanic very well. It was on my way home with my boyfriend that I started to lose my shit. I started to freak out over an obsessive thought that started on Saturday night, about how I did not want to tell my family members, friends or co workers about how the accident happened because I did not want to deal with self righteous judgments about what I should or should not have said to the police officer at the accident. 

Having a car accident is disconcerting enough, having Asperger's just compounds the ordeal. I would be more apt to talk about what happened, but I know the people well enough in my life to know that they will give me their unsolicited opinion on what I should or should not have said or done. I know this, because they do it to me all the time. It's like, oh goodie so not only is your advise a waste of time after the fact, and you don't care about the reasons why I said what I said at MY car accident, but you've made me feel stupid as well. You think that much about yourself and that little of me. 

The short lived meltdown came and went. I just feel bad that I can't trust the people closest to me to be encouraging, they've just disparaged me one too many times...